Two good friends

Two good friends of ours have just been blown to smithereens in a suicide bombing in the northern Sri Lanka town of Anuradapura.

Major General Janaka Perera and his wife Wiyuda were diplomatic colleagues of ours in Canberra where he was, conjointly, High Commissioner to Australia and New Zealand.

The General came to his diplomatic role on leaving the Sri Lankan Army where he had been regarded as a war hero for his 1990s victories against the Tamil rebels.

Passionate about his country, he had a reputation as a hard man and a strong commander in the field. Although we never discussed politics, I have no doubt that, in the Sri Lankan context, he was somewhere to the right of Genghis Khan.

Nevertheless, he was a man of great charm and presence, and a popular diplomatic and golfing colleague.

Wirijuda, the most charming and beautiful wife and mother, had met the General while serving as a Lieutenant in the Army and, as fellow retired army Lieutenants, each married to, shall we say, commanding personalities, she and I shared a sort of subalterns' camaraderie.

The General had become, on returning to Sri Lanka, a head of the United National Party (the official opposition). Entering politics with his sort of reputation, and with the climate of insecurity in Sri Lanka, would seem to me a bold, if not foolhardy, retirement choice. He might have opted, perhaps, for a little cottage by the sea?

But then I've been around long enough to recognise that men of his stature and passions are driven by different sets of rules.

In the peripatetic world of diplomacy we tend to avoid talk of 'friendship' so much as 'collegiality' for we are but ships which pass in the night. We are thrust together for a few years, and then yanked apart. But often the brief friendships we make are very real - we go our own ways with the prospect that we will probably not meet again, but the memories endure.

I shall remember my Sri Lankan friends with great affection.

Were I to believe in a maker, I would doubtless thank him that New Zealand is spared the feuding, the violence, and the misery which pervades much of our world, and has blighted our Sri Lankan friends for so many years. As it is, I can simply thank our luck that this should be so, and trust that we remain alert to the vicissitudes of life together on this planet.